If you are as bored with my melodramatic whinings as I am then promptly head on over to Mad Becka for a saucy, mystery that seems almost too delicious to be true. Catch up on her archives while Becka's off settling some things for the next couple of weeks. She's linked at the sidebar as well... Yes we seem to be doing some housekeeping 'round here...
One of the cats keeps hiding. Then when I don't look for her she sits in her hiding spot and cries. What a baby.
I read A Pale View of Hills today, and while found it enjoyable while I was reading, am slightly haunted by it as the evening wears on. I've chosen to be alone so much lately. It seems harder somehow to be around other people, exhausting somehow. That's something I miss about D. We didn't have to entertain one another. We could just sit and each of us do our own thing, and yet somehow still be together.
In the end it turns out to be about picking and choosing. The things you liked about a person, and didn't like all go into little index cards within your heart and mind. The things you liked about the way things were form ideals about what you'd like the person you form your next relationship with to be like. Not things like tall or short... Though those things are important too... But things like; I want to be able to sit with someone and not feel compelled to talk to them every second. I want us to sit there, doing our respective things, and every once in a while just smile at one another. Or to just be at peace watching TV, knowing we're going to laugh at the same parts of the show.
But I don't want anyone right now. I'm starting to enjoy being by myself. I know some people don't like to be alone, but I really do. It can be lonely sometimes, but even loneliness can be something to appreciate. It won't always be this way, but until I can feel more comfortable with myself around others, I'm happy enough with this.
One of the cats keeps hiding. Then when I don't look for her she sits in her hiding spot and cries. What a baby.
I read A Pale View of Hills today, and while found it enjoyable while I was reading, am slightly haunted by it as the evening wears on. I've chosen to be alone so much lately. It seems harder somehow to be around other people, exhausting somehow. That's something I miss about D. We didn't have to entertain one another. We could just sit and each of us do our own thing, and yet somehow still be together.
In the end it turns out to be about picking and choosing. The things you liked about a person, and didn't like all go into little index cards within your heart and mind. The things you liked about the way things were form ideals about what you'd like the person you form your next relationship with to be like. Not things like tall or short... Though those things are important too... But things like; I want to be able to sit with someone and not feel compelled to talk to them every second. I want us to sit there, doing our respective things, and every once in a while just smile at one another. Or to just be at peace watching TV, knowing we're going to laugh at the same parts of the show.
But I don't want anyone right now. I'm starting to enjoy being by myself. I know some people don't like to be alone, but I really do. It can be lonely sometimes, but even loneliness can be something to appreciate. It won't always be this way, but until I can feel more comfortable with myself around others, I'm happy enough with this.
2 Comments:
Ive been reading MB - Im not sure whether to believe it or not! - Surely shes just got a really good imagination and she buggered off on holiday for a couple weeks?
I almost don't care. She's so fantastically entertaining.
Post a Comment
<< Home